Werewolves?! That ain’t Christian!
I have, for the most part, given up wasting time arguing with people on social media. It’s such an easy trap to fall into, and when you are, like me (not bragging, it’s just a fact), good at rhetoric, it’s even easier. It’s tempting to totally tie up some numbskull in logical knots. It might make you feel accomplished, but it’s fruitless and pointless, ultimately. I keep thinking about the analogy of the pigeon and the chessboard. It doesn’t matter how skilled you might be as a player, the pigeon isn’t going to understand the game, is going to shit on the board and then strut around like it won. Or perhaps an even better analogy. When one argues with a fool, an outsider might not be able to tell who is who.
I made a passing comment in reply to a friend’s post about the necessity of maintaining separation of Church and State. This friend’s mother thought that my comment was directed at her, apparently, and was meant as an insult; in actuality I meant it in general terms. Anyway, she attacked me verbally and, well, I tied her up in a Gordian knot of logic, to the extent that she should have been embarrassed, had she been capable of grasping the whole thing, which honestly I don’t think she was. To be fair and at the risk of being uncharitable, I don’t think she is that bright.
During the exchange, when she couldn’t score any points in any other way, she resorted to ad hominem attacks. She must have scrolled my Facebook profile and seen that I write for this site, because here is a personal message she sent to me: “Werewolves ain’t real! I am a Christian and proud of it!!!” I actually laughed out loud. Um, non sequitur much? At no point had I implied that she was or was not a Christian, or a Hindu, or a Buddhist, or anything else. (I did later, though, since she’d handed me the weapon to use against her, by pointing out the numerous times she had resorted to name-calling as the un-Christ-like behavior that it was.)
Trying to make heads or tails out of her commentary, all that I can deduce is that, to her mind, if one “believes” in werewolves, this construes an overt attack on Christianity. Such concepts as a person working for a website as, you know, a job, or a website being devoted to entertainment, or maintaining a scholarly interest in things like Folklore and Mythology are seemingly beyond her. When I called her on her hypocrisy, she responded by inviting me to her church.
“I can’t set foot in a church!” I said. “I’m a werewolf!”
It wouldn’t be Christian of me to show up there in heavy werewolf makeup would it? It’d be funny as hell, though.
I’m currently telling the little devil on my shoulder to be quiet.
WAYNE MILLER is the owner and creative director of EVIL CHEEZ PRODUCTIONS (www.evilcheezproductions.blogspot.com, www.facebook.com/evilcheezproductions), specializing in theatrical performances and haunted attractions. He has written, produced and directed (and occasionally acted in) over a dozen plays, most of them in the Horror and Crime genres. His first novel, THE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF, is available for purchase at https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/734763
MORTUI VELOCES SUNT!