Werewolves on the Loose!
One of the most trusted sources of supernatural news, the Internet, has yet again struck gold in the werewolf world…. where most of their politics are kept secret. Apparently, the other day a werewolf was freed from imprisonment, imposed upon him after being found guilty of the brutal murders of two hitchhikers in Yorkshire. The werewolf implied that he was repentant of his crimes, though he was not actually certain that his murdering days were over. You’d think after a testimony like that, the authorities would hasten to try him for threats against the safety of the public, but, his lawyer claims that the werewolf, a Mr. Snell, is soon to die and too feeble to be a threat to anyone.
Covering this controversial topic is a blog whose credibility has been brought into question several times; read the whole story here:
Mr Snell apparently became a werewolf after drinking contaminated water whilst on holiday in Butlins.
His solicitor said ‘Mr Snell is no longer a menace to society, he is a frail old man who has not got long to live and should be allowed to spend his last few months at home to die in peace.’
Asked what he intended to do during his last few months, Mr Snell answered- ‘I’m just going to have a little get together with some close friends to celebrate my release. I think we’ll have an outdoor BBQ on the moors, plenty of chicken ribs and some beer and perhaps watch the eclipse. Nothing can go wrong.’
When asked if he thought he would ever kill again, Mr Snell answered: ‘I hope not, its not any fun for me either, transforming into a giant man eating wolf. I’d prefer to be golfing. Woof.’”
Personally, what’s troubling to me is that there was no formal complaint made to local Butlins government about the status of their drinking water. Clearly, a catastrophe such as contracting werewolf-ism should be investigated, otherwise, there may have been an outbreak; in fact, hundreds of werewolves may be roaming Butlins even now! And the only question in my mind as to the credibility of our sources… is the strange picture they seem to have used in order to shield Mr. Snell’s true identity. …You don’t really believe that’s what a real werewolf looks like? Right?