Werewolf Chicks: Not as Hot as You Think

There are a ton of women and feminists out there, who keep complaining, that there aren’t enough hot werewolf chicks. Well, what about the Ginger Snaps Trilogy? And frankly, there are a few reasons, why werewolf-ism, is really kind of male exclusive in terms of ‘hotness’. In the words of a delusional friend of mine, “this is a wolf-man’s world.” Here are a few reasons why werewolf girls, just aren’t as sexy:

1. Saggy werewolf boobs, –there are six of them, and face it, canine boobs have never been attractive to anyone other than the most dedicated bestiality devotee.

2. Females of the canine species are more aggressive than males, –and aren’t bitchy, nagging, cranky women bad enough as it is? Do we really need to give them fangs and claws?

3. Hairy women. Do I need to say more? That might be the thing in New Zealand, but in most popular cultures, we prefer women without beards and back hair.

4. A dog with fleas is one thing. A chick with fleas, is another, entirely different, gross, weird, unhygienic thing.

5. No offense girls, but you already have one monthly curse. It’s just not right to add another bloody, violent time of the month.

And those are just a few of the reasons! Not that we’re trying to be sexist here, –but maybe the whole werewolf thing should be left up to the men. Hairy, flea-bitten, cranky men aren’t exactly oddities. On the other hand, if you want to find hairy, flea-bitten, cranky women who eat live animals and attack tourists, you have to go all the way to Oceania.


  1. Oh thats bad! funny but bad.

    One could argue that you’re steroytyping werewolves so they resemble solely the hollywood version of a werewolf, which clearly isn’t always on the mark about werewolves.

    There are many legends of werewolf females being very beautiful, and with their beauty they would ensnare lustful human guys and proceed to kill them.

  2. ARGH! You have destroyed my dreams! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

    Haha! Awesome! I always thinked in that, but hey, Werewolf Chicks are still very, very hot to me

  3. They’re probably many more hot werewolf chicks but they just don’t get out much as they are too busy grooming their fur making sure it is just so! :)

  4. To be hot or not, that´s the vampires way of live. Lycantropy is about the right to be yourself, about be free in a way you can even imagine before. Man or voman, when you finally got claws it´s time to look in the world´s eyes and say “catch me if you can”
    Buuuuuuuuuuuuuut it´s just the opinion of a hairy one.

  5. axtualy i think werewolf chicks are still hot but i think they should keep their “real” self during fullmoons

  6. Okay…Funny article but, I think, a bit off.

    Like Robert V. said, these are all stereotypes Hollywood has given us for what werewolves look/act like. Mythology is all relative; after all, not every werewolf has the wolf-man ( hair sprouting from every pore, fingernails into claws, shirt ripping) transformation.

    Female werewolves don’t necessarily need to be hairy. I hate to mention Twilight – No, really, I HATE to – but Jacob Black has a three-frame transformation that shows the basic man-pants shred-wolf transformation. And, as all of the wolf pack’s missing shirts seem to tell, the only hair we get to see is on top of their head.

    “Bitchy” she-wolves are about the equivalent to “territorial” males. I think personality has little to do with transformation in women, the same way not all men are testosterone-run rapists. It’s what culture and mythology might form that matters.

    What really bugs me about some of this: not-so-handsome men have played werewolves in the past. I mean, not every actor is Hugh Jackman. In some movies, the men are sexualized “beasts”, ect; in others, the werewolves/actors are there to be the best of what they are: monsters. Why does every woman have to be sexualized/”sexy” while playing a monster?

    No offense, but the remake of the Wolfman was not exactly a turn on >.>…

  7. listen,guys.my mate is different,even tho she is a werewolf.she does have 6 titties,but they are HUGE!and they are anything BUT floppy!she is for the most part calm.she also doesn’t have a beard! you are just WRONG!

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