The Devil Made ‘Em Do It Again!

They’re Still Out There! The Satanic Panic-ers of the 80s all had children, and those children grew up to follow in their parents’ imbecilic footsteps. Did you know that if you are letting your kid watch Disney’s DESCENDANTS movie series you are endangering their precious little souls? (Sure you are.) Because the films are pure satanic indoctrination! (Sure they are.) Honestly the site making such claims is so ridiculous that it could very well be a satire site. It’s impossible to say. These folks could be as well-meaning but logic-challenged as the pious morons behind the so-called “documentary” film “The Deception of a Generation”, who tried, back in the 80s, to warn parents that the Smurfs, He-man, and Scooby-Doo were leading their children straight to hell. Ah, nostalgia! (I wonder whatever happened to those dorks? I’m betting at least one of ’em got pinched for kiddie porn.)

As far as nostalgia goes, who here remembers when the Proctor and Gamble company was “outed” as being run by Satanists? I do! I remember the claim that the company CEO admitted it on an episode of Phil Donahue. (This never happened.) We can blame it on the company’s at-the-time logo, a bearded Man in the Moon and 13 stars. It looked all esoteric to some, and thus it MUST have been satanic! We can also blame it on the fact that people are stupid. The whole thing was a complete urban legend, but it cost the company millions in the long run.

I think Proctor and Gamble needs to bring back their old logo. Let’s see if we can make some religious wackjobs’ heads explode!

By The Evil Cheezman

WAYNE MILLER is the owner and creative director of EVIL CHEEZ PRODUCTIONS (www.evilcheezproductions.blogspot.com, www.facebook.com/evilcheezproductions), specializing in theatrical performances and haunted attractions. He has written, produced and directed (and occasionally acted in) over a dozen plays, most of them in the Horror and Crime genres. His first novel, THE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF, is available for purchase at https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/734763 MORTUI VELOCES SUNT!

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