SyFy Movie ‘Never Cry Werewolf’ with Nina Dobrev of The Vampire Diaries
The first thing you think when you see ‘SyFy movie’ in any review title is, ‘Here we go, more crappy effects in a hastily thrown together creature feature.’ Well, what the hell is wrong with that? Especially when you throw in an actress like Nina Dobrev who plays Elena in The Vampire Diaries; the other hottie in show, –the first and foremost being Ian Somerhalder, who plays Damon. Nina Dobrev has another annoying little brother in this flick, though this time, he doesn’t do drugs and screw the town whore.
Nina Dobrev plays Loren Hansett, your average, everyday high school girl until a werewolf moves in next door. Her little brother, Kyle, played by Spencer Van Wyck, seems impressed with the new neighbor but Loren begins getting suspicious immediately. The new guy in town, Jared Martin, gives her a bad first impression with his hairy palms and unhealthy attraction to her. Hmm, can anyone say, “jail bait”? She gets even more suspicious when people start disappearing in their neighborhood.
Now, this is where things take a left turn down the long, unoriginal, –but still, somehow fun, –road to Fright Night. With the help of Kevin Sorbo, –yeah, Hercules, –and some delivery boy with a crush on her, Loren sets out to stalk the werewolf, slay him and set things to rights. Kevin Sorbo actually plays Redd Tucker, gun aficionado and expert hunter, –the host of a hunting show who you know, is utterly full of shit. Much like the famed vampire hunter from Fright Night. If this doesn’t immediately sound familiar, then you obviously didn’t see Fright Night nine million times like the rest of us.
But all the similarities shouldn’t distract you from the fact that the movie is full of hilarious effects, campy horror action, Herculean feats of bravery, creepy guys chasing hot young high school chicks, dorky guys chasing hot young high school chicks, and you know, obviously, hot young high school chicks. Who are all, hopefully, over 18. If not, say a few Hail Mary’s, and call us in the morning. (Don’t actually call us.)