I know this movie came out a month-and-a-half ago. I’ve just been really busy the past few weeks. I only had the chance to go see the movie over this past weekend. Honestly I doubt you all need a review, anyway—but such has never stopped me before from sharing my views and opinions with the world. No need to stop now. What I mean, though, is that even if you haven’t seen the movie yet, you likely aren’t on the fence about whether or not to head to your local theater to do so, a precarious balance that my endorsement (for such this review shall surely be) will serve as the tipping point, sending you to Fandango as quickly as you can type in the letters. If you liked the cartoon version of the film you will love this live-action one, and if you didn’t, you won’t. It really is as simple as that.

The movie is a fairy tale. If you don’t care for fairy tales, you’ll want to skip it. Yes, there is plenty for the lycanthrope mark to savor—the FX are incredible; the film in totality is a sumptuous feast for the eyes, and the fight between the Beast and the pack of wolves alone is worth the prize of admission, in my not so always humble opinion—but there’s a lot of singing, too, so the exclusive Horror fan must weight the one against the other.

My only complaint—and this is with the fairy tale itself, not just with the movie versions of it—is this: I don’t like that the Beast is “cured” of his beastliness at the end. (Apparently Belle doesn’t, either, as she asks the now handsome Prince to consider growing a beard in the final scene.) It was as the Beast that he found his soul, and Belle loves him just the way he is. Why not allow him to retain his monstrous aspect? Even though it is a far inferior film in every way, I prefer the way SHREK handled it, when it is shown that the true beauty of an individual comes from the soul, and rather than having Shrek turn into a handsome prince, his princess is transformed into a female ogre. I prefer to think, after the movie ends, the Prince retains the ability to shift back into his beastly form when he wants or needs to. Hey, Disney, therein lies the seeds for a sequel!

By The Evil Cheezman

WAYNE MILLER is the owner and creative director of EVIL CHEEZ PRODUCTIONS (,, specializing in theatrical performances and haunted attractions. He has written, produced and directed (and occasionally acted in) over a dozen plays, most of them in the Horror and Crime genres. His first novel, THE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF, is available for purchase at


Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.