Movie Review: KRAMPUS: THE CHRISTMAS DEVIL

There’s this movie called THE ROOM. It’s gained a huge cult following specifically because of how lousy it is. Friends, I have to tell you, if you think THE ROOM is bad, watch KRAMPUS: THE CHRISTMAS DEVIL. This movie was written, directed, and produced by one guy, named Jason Hull. I dig on auteurs, and the fact that a movie has a budget of about fifteen dollars doesn’t mean anything in terms of whether or not it’ll be any good. I went into this one all hopeful. I really wanted to like it. Also, as a film critic I am fair. More than fair. I’ll give a movie a chance. Oftentimes, as I’m watching a movie, I’m pulling for it, too. I want it to succeed. But there’s a point where I just have to call it.

KRAMPUS: THE CHRISTMAS DEVIL just. Plain. SUCKS.

Please, PLEASE don’t confuse this one with the brilliant Michael Dougherty-directed bigscreen Horror-Comedy also entitled KRAMPUS. It’s about as far from the detritus that is this OTHER movie as–Let’s put it this way: it would take a spaceship traveling at the speed of light about 20,000 years to get from one to the other.

Wooden acting. Stilted dialogue. A near-incomprehensible script. And they turned their Krampus into a pervert. Honestly, I have never seen a more amateurish effort. And this isn’t the fun kind of bad movie. This is the kind that’s so sorry that you can’t even enjoy laughing at it. The kind that is an affront to the senses. There really aren’t words adequate to convey just how poor of a film it is. That writer/director/producer guy? If I were him–for one thing, I’d try to get my name taken off this piece of flotsam. Also I’d never even think about making another movie. And if I were him, I’d get really nervous around Christmastime, afraid the REAL Krampus would be coming for my talentless ass. That pervy thing in Hull’s movie AIN’T Krampus, and I don’t think the real Christmas Devil would much appreciate being slandered like that.

For the love of all that is holy, do NOT watch this movie!

By The Evil Cheezman

WAYNE MILLER is the owner and creative director of EVIL CHEEZ PRODUCTIONS (www.evilcheezproductions.blogspot.com, www.facebook.com/evilcheezproductions), specializing in theatrical performances and haunted attractions. He has written, produced and directed (and occasionally acted in) over a dozen plays, most of them in the Horror and Crime genres. His first novel, THE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF, is available for purchase at https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/734763 MORTUI VELOCES SUNT!

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