Got a Light?
He’s called “the Woodsman,” or alternately one of the “bearded men.” He and his cohorts look like they’ve been in a fire. I initially theorized that they had been at the site of the first atomic bomb explosion, somehow caught in the conflagration, perhaps while inside that dingy-looking service station. (They’re all sooty and stuff.) More likely, though, they have been in a forest fire. They are lumberjacks, and, as the trees–better capitalize that; the Trees–in TWIN PEAKS have a spiritual, otherworldly significance, it only seems appropriate that these evil denizens of a dark dimension–the simplest explanation is that they are demons–would be in the habit of felling trees and burning forests down.
Oh, did I forget to mention that I’m talking about the recently-completed third season of TWIN PEAKS? Do forgive me; I sometimes forget that not everybody is a fan (but should be) and will automatically know what I’m talking about. I’d figured the title of this article would have tipped you off, as “Got a light?” is the catchphrase of the creepy leader of the Woodsmen/Bearded Men/Lumberjacks. He usually asks it of someone before he crushes their skulls with his hands.
It’s amusingly ironic that the guy playing the head Woodsman is an affable, pleasant Abe Lincoln impersonator, then, isn’t it?
WAYNE MILLER is the owner and creative director of EVIL CHEEZ PRODUCTIONS (www.evilcheezproductions.blogspot.com, www.facebook.com/evilcheezproductions), specializing in theatrical performances and haunted attractions. He has written, produced and directed (and occasionally acted in) over a dozen plays, most of them in the Horror and Crime genres. His first novel, THE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF, is available for purchase at https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/734763
MORTUI VELOCES SUNT!