Bones with Bite Marks

Dammit! This dude in Germany is gonna make us all look bad! They say that the suspect in a case of murder and cannibalism from Berlin, a high school teacher who has not yet been identified, had shown an interest in cannibalism before his recent arrest, after the discovery of a body with bones bearing human bite marks.

Have you ever encountered one of those priggish types who, opposed to, say, gay marriage, upon finding out that you support it or whatever thing it is that gets their knickers twisted, replies with something like, “Oh, you must be in favor of pedophilia, too, then!” Or, as I had heard once years ago upon voicing an opinion in favor of a State lottery to fund education (let it be noted that I have never in my life purchased a lotto ticket; not that I’m saying there’s anything wrong with that; it was just that I supported adequate funding for our schools), ‘Oh! Well, you must be in favor of cockfighting, then!” Such people simply don’t get it. Even if the thing to which they are objecting were in some way “wrong”, they have no concept of the fallacy of the Slippery Slope or of the non-sequitur. You can be sure, though, that it will be such people who will now proclaim, “See! You shoulda known there was something wrong with that guy! He showed an interest in cannibalism!”

Lookit, some of us simply have an intellectual, clinical interest in the subject of anthropophagy, awright? Doesn’t mean we secretly wanna try some long pig ala mode!

[FYI: “Long pig” is what the cannibals of Papua New Guinea called human flesh served as a meal.]

By The Evil Cheezman

WAYNE MILLER is the owner and creative director of EVIL CHEEZ PRODUCTIONS (,, specializing in theatrical performances and haunted attractions. He has written, produced and directed (and occasionally acted in) over a dozen plays, most of them in the Horror and Crime genres. His first novel, THE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF, is available for purchase at


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