Author: The Evil Cheezman

I should state upfront that I have not vetted the reliability of the website providing this linked article. I don’t know if its reputation passes scientific credibility muster. (Not “mustard”. Although “Scientific Credibility Mustard” would make for one gonzo name for an Alternative band, don’t you think?) It seems to, and we’ll give the benefit…Continue readingGiant Wolf, or Direwolf?

Who woulda thunk it? Seattle, of all places. The birthplace of Grunge. On the list of places I want to visit in my lifetime, Seattle would have been dang near at the bottom. Doesn’t it rain there, like, every single day? Seattle. Ugh. No thank you. No offense to anyone living there who actually likes…Continue readingHeaven is in Seattle

Is it *possible* it could be a baby Thylacine? Yes. It’s possible. Is it also possible it could be somebody’s frikkin’ housecat? Yep. Also possible. And of the two possibilities, which is the more likely? The footage is anything but conclusive. It isn’t even good enough to garner mentioning, not that this stopped Neil Waters,…Continue readingThat Thylacine Footage

The village, when they got to it, didn’t look like much. Not that Maribelle had expected it to. It had a few constructions of rusted metal and plywood hammered together into small domiciles, interspersed with more traditional native huts, all laid out in irregular circles surrounding the heart and lifeblood of the village, its well.…Continue readingBLACKMANE Chapter Seven

Bryan Bertino, the writer-slash-director of such fantabulous fare as THE STRANGERS (and its sequel THE STRANGERS: PREY AT NIGHT, for which he wrote the screenplay) and the incomparable THE MONSTER, hits another one out of the park with his latest, THE DARK AND THE WICKED, even if the old flyball doesn’t sail quite as far…Continue readingMovie Review: THE DARK AND THE WICKED

The problem with Nicolas Cage movies is that you never know ahead of time which Nicolas Cage you’re going to get. There are two, you know. It’s like Agent Dale Cooper in TWIN PEAKS. At some point several years ago, Nicolas Cage got trapped in the Black Lodge and was replaced by an evil doppelganger.…Continue readingMovie Review: PRIMAL

It made big headlines. Neil Waters, the president of the Thylacine Awareness Group out of Australia, claims to have captured several living thylacines on a wildlife camera trap set in Tasmania. “I know what they are and so do a few independent expert witnesses,” he says. “We believe the first image is the mum, we…Continue readingThylacine Rediscovered—Or Not

This one is WRONG TURN, only set in England on the banks of a dingy canal and with carnivorous mutant fish people instead of cannibalistic inbred hillbillies. Now seasoned Horror marks will know that WRONG TURN is really THE HILLS HAVE EYES, only with cannibalistic inbred hillbillies instead of cannibalistic inbred (and possibly mutated to…Continue readingMovie Review: THE BARGE PEOPLE

She sat up in the darkness of the room, listening. The sound that had awakened her repeated. Three knocks on the room’s single door. Maribelle got to her feet. “Who is it?” “It’s Hamm.” Maribelle frowned. She opened the door. “How soon can you get ready?” Hamm asked. “Uh, just give me a couple minutes.”…Continue readingBLACKMANE Chapter Six

I’d like to find the artist responsible for the image on the right (above) so I can give him/her proper credit. Whoever created the piece gets props from yours truly for being literate. The work is obviously inspired by the image on the upper left, which is a still from the short film A TRIP…Continue readingA Bullet in Your Eye

I don’t know who created this piece of Art. If it was you and you’d like credit, just give us a holler and we’ll be happy to oblige. Or if you know the person responsible, give them a holler and tell them to give us a holler. Or you can just credit them yourself. Whatevs.…Continue readingBritish Folklore, Mapped

Here’s the spin: “Soon after violent masked drifters dressed as wolves arrive in a small rural town, a local young couple goes missing and their bodies are discovered near a ranch run by brother and sister, Tommy and June. Her ex-boyfriend and local deputy sheriff Luke start suspecting Tommy of murder, leaving the siblings ostracized…Continue readingWhat Comes in THE DEAD OF NIGHT?

“April 6. Well I’m here at last. Kenya. The village is all I expected it to be. ‘I a stranger, and afraid,’ and all that. Yes, Toto, we are a long way from Kansas now.” She paused to listen for a minute as several other voices had joined in the argument. *Great. A riot outside…Continue readingBlackmane Chapter Five

We have more details on the upcoming PREDATOR movie. Courtesy of a new production listing: “The story will follow Kee, a Comanche woman who goes against gender norms and traditions to become a warrior. Many years ago – in a time before any Europeans had ever encroached on their lands – the Comanche people had…Continue readingPREDATOR and PredatorS

A couple of vehicles rolled past them in the street, both pick-up trucks. A man went by leading a herd of goats. They scattered a few chickens that were pecking in the dirt. Hamm led the way to a two-story stucco building, stepping up under the low veranda. Maribelle couldn’t help but notice the walls,…Continue readingBLACKMANE Chapter Four

If ever I have encountered a better premise and set-up for a gloriously cheesy Sci-Fi Horror flick, I cannot remember it. Scientists are growing little blobs of Neanderthal brains. What could possibly go wrong? And they’ve found that Neanderthal DNA, when introduced, can alter human brain tissue. This just keeps getting better! A virus that…Continue readingNeanderthal Brain Blobs

As far as giant killer pig movies go, Russell Mulcahy’s (and writers Everett De Roche’s and Peter Brennan’s) RAZORBACK from 1984 stands head and tusks above the rest. It’s the CITIZEN KANE of giant killer pig movies. Now we have a new contender. BOAR is right up there with it. It’s a grand, old-fashioned “nature…Continue readingMovie Review: BOAR

One thing that struck me (and by this I mean it struck my lovely better half, who was watching the film with me, and who pointed it out to me; I was myself too entranced by what I was seeing to contemplate much of anything) while viewing THE FURY OF THE WOLFMAN (aka LA FURIA…Continue readingDid Daninsky’s Villainess Inspire DARK SHADOWS?

The right front wheel of the bus bounced into a pothole, jarring her and stealing her attention from the papers on her lap. She looked up. The driver was already braking, slowing down. The brakes squealed and the bus shuddered as it came to a stop. The driver looked back at her over his shoulder.…Continue readingBLACKMANE Chapter Three

I must speak. There is something reassuring about seeing these words, now. By typing them they become real. They are no longer in my head alone, where they might be a delusion, or madness. I tap on this keyboard and the words appear, and by so doing I give them a permanence, or at least…Continue readingBLACKMANE Chapter Two

No, this one has nothing to do with the Universal Monsters character the Wolfman, not the Lon Chaney Jr. version or the Benecio Del Toro version. Rather this Spanish feature (alternately known as WOLFMAN NEVER SLEEPS) is the fourth in the multi-picture series of films featuring the character Waldemar Daninsky, portrayed by actor Paul Naschy.…Continue readingMovie Review: THE FURY OF THE WOLFMAN (1970)

It’s funny how, as a writer, your views of your work can change with time. Hopefully, if you’re doing it right, if it’s working the way it’s supposed to work, you keep getting better at it as you go. You keep improving. And something that you considered your masterpiece, the greatest work you’d ever be…Continue readingIntroducing BLACKMANE

FACT: The Human-Animal Hybrid Prohibition Act (H.R. 5910) was introduced into the House of Representatives in 2008 (having been introduced into the U.S. Senate one year earlier) but never passed. FACT: Several states, including Arizona and Louisiana, have proposed laws banning the creation or propagation of human-animal hybrids, also called chimeras. FACT: In 2004, the…Continue readingBLACKMANE Chapter One

Afterword It is all too easy to dismiss the numerous eyewitness accounts from ages past of the thing we in our modern parlance refer to as “werewolf,” no matter how credible those accounts might otherwise be. If the people of past centuries (and millennia, for in truth accounts detailing werewolf-like creatures are far older than…Continue readingTHE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF – Finale

God surprised me one last time. I had not expected to survive the encounter with Lycanon, praying only that my death might accomplish God’s will. But survive I did. My brothers the monks climbed the mountain and found my ravaged body where it lay upon the fallen stones of Lycanon’s temple. The demon was no…Continue readingTHE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF Part 65

It’s hard for an enterprising Horror mark these days to keep up with the theatrical release dates for upcoming genre films, as they keep moving them. This, then, is your handy guide, as of right now, to the upcoming cinematic offerings of 2021. These are, it goes without saying, subject to change. But as of…Continue readingMovie Switcheroo

I recently watched this paranormal documentary-type show, a relatively well-done one wherein the investigator approached the subject from a journalistic standpoint, not sensationalizing things but not displaying closed-mindedness either, a stance that I wish all investigators would adopt. This particular program put a unique spin on things—unique insofar as such television programs are concerned—by suggesting…Continue readingAre Werewolves and Skinwalkers the Same Thing?

AMC just managed to gather up some much needed fundage, I read. Or “capital”, as it is referred to in the business vernacular. Enough that they won’t be going bankrupt anytime soon. Enough to get them through the year, they said, or at least halfway, if they didn’t make a single cent (which they will).…Continue readingCoronavirus and the (Monster) Movies

You’ve probably seen the headline. Some Congressman from Oklahoma wants to establish a hunting season for Bigfoot. Then this same Congressman apparently got his feelings hurt when people started calling him stupid. Come on, dude. If you say, or post, stupid things, you should expect that somebody, somewhere is gonna call you an idiot. No…Continue readingHunting Bigfoot

I just watched KISS MEETS THE PHANTOM OF THE PARK for the first time since I saw it as a little boy. I waxed nostalgic about it over at our sister site VAMPIRES.COM. The whole blood-drinking thing with the Demon, Gene Simmons, made it a perfect fit, and there’s a Count Dracula automaton in it,…Continue readingKISS versus the Werewolves

[The conclusion of the battle between Christopher and the King of the Werewolves] “No!” I crawled. I pushed myself up. “No…more!” Lycanon stomped on me with one of his hoofed feet, shattering my spine. I vomited blood. “Yes! And forever!” Lycanon turned from me. Turned all of its eyes away. The moon remained, filling my…Continue readingTHE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF Part 64

[NOTE: This is it, peeps! The first installment of the big fight between the beasts!] Never, save once, have I remembered with such perfect clarity the things that happen when I am in the form of the beast. All other times, the memories are distant, as though viewed through water, more like a dream half…Continue readingTHE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF Part 63

First things first. This movie should not have been titled WRONG TURN. It should have been called THE FOUNDATION. I get that the same guy who wrote the original WRONG TURN wrote this one and they wanted to keep the continuity, but the title scarcely applies to this new film. The characters do take a…Continue readingMovie Review: WRONG TURN

Having watched GORILLA AT LARGE this past week, and having been sent on a magical mystery tour of nostalgia by it, I started consulting my old memory banks, trying to remember which of the two special 3-D broadcasts I recall from my childhood, the aforementioned GORILLA and REVENGE OF THE CREATURE, actually aired first. It…Continue readingWhich Came First, the Creature or the Gorilla?

Back in the 80s, somebody had the novel idea of repurposing old 1950s Sci-Fi and Horror flicks and airing them in their original 3-D on broadcast television. It must not have proven cost-effective for them because only a couple of movies ever aired, REVENGE OF THE CREATURE, the sequel to CREATURE FROM THE BLACK LAGOON,…Continue readingRevisiting the Classics: GORILLA AT LARGE

I had no idea that this low-budget effort was actually the third in a series. There for sure wasn’t anything from any earlier movies that I needed to have seen to follow this one. And honestly, there’s no reason this one should have been a Krampus movie at all. It would have worked better had…Continue readingMovie Review: KRAMPUS: ORIGINS

I made it through 2020 way better than I’d feared I would. I’d been afraid boredom would pose as great a threat to my wellbeing as the ‘Ronavirus. Thankfully that didn’t happen. While it did force the partial shutdown of my theatrical company, EVIL CHEEZ PRODUCTIONS, we managed to perform one full outdoor production and…Continue readingA Tentpole-less Summer?

NOTE: I keep seeing them referred to as “dire wolves”, even in scholarly sources like this linked article. But it bugs me. “Dire wolves” means wolves that are dire. This is an accurate description, as far as that goes, but it isn’t grammatically correct, not if the term is meant to designate a separate species…Continue readingDirewolves: A Different Beast

We knew that Oscar Isaac was going to be playing the lead in the new Marvel series MOON KNIGHT for Disney’s streaming service (although it has yet to be “officially” confirmed), and now we know that Ethan Hawke has signed on to play the big bad. We don’t know which villain he’ll be portraying, though.…Continue readingMOON KNIGHT and SWAMP THING News

It’d been a little while since I took a roadtrip, and this past weekend presented a perfect opportunity. It was a lovely day, but cold, thus ruling out any outdoor activities. An ideal day for driving, then! But where to go? I’d heard stories about Chickenfoot, an area of Lawrence County, Alabama, for years, but…Continue readingThe Beast of Chickenfoot

I’m a sucker for a good Wendigo movie at any time. Note that I said *good* Wendigo movie. As I recall, RAVENOUS was mediocre as hell, not bad enough to be fun but not good, either. I need to go back and rewatch it, as I might appreciate it a little more now, being older…Continue readingThe Wendigo of BLACK WOOD

This is the guy who brought us GERALD’S GAME, THE HAUNTING OF HILL HOUSE, the underrated OCULUS, and the amazeballs DOCTOR SLEEP, just in case you didn’t recognize the name. The dude knows what he’s doing, for sure, and what he does best is high-quality Horror. And he wants to do a Clayface movie. That’s…Continue readingMike Flanagan Wants Clayface

A clip 40 years in the making! Or close enough! I first saw the movie GRIZZLY when it was broadcast on network television around 1978 or so. I was just a wee thing, and the film, though edited to be broadcast on TV, scared the wee out of me. (The fact that I lived basically…Continue readingThe Grizzly Cometh!

So how exactly did we get dogs? How did wolves become domesticated? Ancient wolves sure wouldn’t have looked any more cute and cuddly than any of the other predators that hunted and preyed upon ancient human beings. (Maybe as puppies.) So how did it occur to our primitive forebears that making friends with the wolf…Continue readingScraps

One of the many communities I belong to on social media is dedicated to the MISSING411 phenomenon. This, if you are unfamiliar, is the field of expertise of a man named David Paulides, who investigates cases of strange disappearances in national parks and other wilderness areas. Most of the people who belong to this group…Continue reading411 Skeptics

“I do not believe I have ever witnessed a more disgraceful sight.” It took me a few seconds to recognize the voice as my own. One’s voice always sounds different in one’s own ears than it does to others. But I knew the voice I heard speaking, coming from nowhere in particular but all around…Continue readingTHE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF Part 62

I’ve been writing about this one for some time now. I had really hoped that it would be released to theaters in my geographic area, yet it never was. Yesterday I finally got hold of it on DVD. Was it worth the wait? Well, kinda, I guess. I wanted to like this one a lot…Continue readingMovie Review: THE WOLF OF SNOW HOLLOW

A sense of uncleanness and foreboding grew thicker the higher I climbed, a palpable presence. Here I saw no other living thing. The air ceased to stir. I came at last to the temple site. The structure itself had long since collapsed, long before my time. Its walls lay in pieces now, broken slabs scattered…Continue readingTHE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF Part 61

According to Screen Rant they are. I hadn’t noticed. Yes, I *did* notice that there were no big screen, big studio movies featuring werewolves in theaters right now, or for the past few years. But fewer werewolves than vampires? Fewer werewolves than appearances by Frankenstein? Didn’t seem like it to me. “The main takeaway from…Continue readingWerewolves Less Popular Nowadays?

The movie is titled WEREWOLF but it isn’t readily clear that there are no actual werewolves in this film. Not literal werewolves, at any rate. It does have killer dogs, and you could argue that there are werewolves present, but they are werewolves of the mind, conceptual werewolves. Here’s the official synopsis: “Children liberated from…Continue readingPolish WEREWOLF Dogs