Author: The Evil Cheezman

First, the official synopsis, aka the spiel: “Paul lives an isolated life with his father in upstate New York. He finds making friends impossible due to a rare condition he has known as congenital hypertrichosis–an affliction that causes an abnormal amount of hair growth all over his face and body. On his 13th birthday, Paul…Continue readingLooking for THE TRUE ADVENTURES OF WOLFBOY

Well, why not? A better question would be, why is FROST BITE shooting for a summer 2021 release instead of waiting to release at Christmas? Especially since Director Airell Hayles said: “I love Christmas [H]orror movies, and to work with this cast on such a crazy story really is another nightmare come true…” Christmas Horror…Continue readingSanta is a Werewolf

The forthcoming film BLOOD “follows Jess (Michelle Monaghan of TRUE DETECTIVE and MESSIAH, as well as the perhaps unwise upcoming remake of THE CRAFT), a separated mother and nurse who moves with her daughter and young son Owen back into her old family farmhouse. Shortly after settling in, Owen is bitten by the family dog,…Continue readingWill BLOOD have Bite?

The maw of the werewolf snapped closed over the gladiator’s face. His skull gave way beneath the pressure of its jaws. The giant died before my transformation had even completed. Then the beast put on quite a show for the populace of glorious Rome. It tore the giant’s carcass apart, sending his blood up in…Continue readingTHE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF Part 44

Christopher Nolan had the guts to stick to it, and TENET opened in theaters, just as he’d promised it would. And it did okay—relatively. It did about as well as it was expected to do, with circumstances being what they are. But it sure didn’t rake in the quadzillions of smackers that greedy movie studios…Continue readingThe Movie-going Experience is Dead. Long Live the Movie-going Experience!

It almost seems conspiratorial. A judge negated all the anti-trust laws that had been in place since the days of Teddy Roosevelt, laws that kept the big studios from buying their own theaters, and it happened at exactly the time when movie theater chains are the most vulnerable due to the coronavirus shutdown. You’d almost…Continue readingCould Movie Theater Monopolies Actually be a Good Thing?

Halloween is going to look and feel a little different this year, what with the real-world Horror we’ve all been living through since March. (Look, whatever your opinion regarding the deadliness of the virus, and we must concede that it has an over 99% survival rate, thank the Almighty, there are still over 200,000 dead…Continue readingAlternative Halloweens and the Bride of Frankenstein

Dread Central has the exclusive, so we must give them the credit. They have two exclusive clips from the new werewolf Horror flick BEAST WITHIN. Check them out by clicking here. Here is the synopsis: “A new gaming app Werewolves Awaken is being launched at a VIP event hosted by an eccentric billionaire at his…Continue readingBEAST WITHIN

That werewolf movie we’ve heard about from Jim Cummings, we can assume it’s this one, THE WOLF OF SNOW HOLLOW. And it will be arriving shortly, on October 9th from Orion Classics. It’s going to be released to theaters and to VOD on the same day. I damn sure hope it comes to some theater…Continue readingThe Werewolf of Winter Arrives a Little Early

Guillermo Del Toro is working on a stop-motion movie about Pinocchio, you may recall. In a recent conversation, he extrapolated on the similarities between that classic fairytale and the immortal story of Frankenstein. “To me, they’re not exactly the same, but they’re similar. They are both creatures that are created and thrown into a world…Continue readingPinocchio and Frankenstein

Now I have the song “Red Skies at Night” from The Fixx stuck in my head, only instead of those words I’m hearing “Cave bear on ice! Cave bear on ice! Whoah oh oh oh oh oh oh!” Yes, it’s a weird place inside my head. Our ancestors had a hard go, if you think…Continue readingCave Bear on Ice

“You will fight,” the Gamesmaster had promised me. Fool that I was, to consider that it could have been otherwise! The Romans knew as much about my condition as I did, and more. Already they knew the lesson of silver and the power it held over one of my kind. They also knew, as I…Continue readingTHE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF Part 43

I put the question to Eddie, the docent at the South Carolina Cotton Museum on the day of my visit. Does he believe the Lizardman is real, or is it all just a big hoax? With a smile, he told me about the automobiles that were damaged back during the Lizardman’s reign of not-so-terrifying-terror in…Continue readingLizardman: Is It For Real? Part Four: Taking It to the Grave

As skeptics have supposedly found holes in the account made by 17-year-old Christopher Davis, who was attacked—well, his car was—by Lizardman, so too have those who looked at it with a critical eye been able to poke some holes in the admission of Brother Elmore that it was he who scared Davis on the night…Continue readingLizardman: Is It For Real? Part Three: Fake Footprints?

The only reported incident where the Lizard Man attempted to attack a human being occurred in 1988, when a 17-year-old named Christopher Davis, driving home from work late at night down Browntown Road, had a blowout near the butterbean drying shed owned by local farmer “Brother” Elmore. After stopping to fix the tire, Davis said:…Continue readingLizardman: Is It For Real? Part Two: The Butterbean Shed

Forgive me, friends, but I just got back from Bishopville, South Carolina and I still have Lizardman on the brain. I got tons of material during my trip to serve as fodder for articles on this site, and I aim to make use of it all. Also it lets me mentally revisit my recent escapades,…Continue readingLizardman: Is It For Real? Part One

Beyond Caesar’s absent and distracted influence, I encountered there in the hallway of that building a much more personal, more involved evil. No taller than the Emperor, but younger and leaner, the second man clad in the robes of a politician had the look of a mongrel dog starved to the point of death and…Continue readingTHE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF Part 42

Whatever expectations I might have entertained about the Emperor, and in truth I had given it little thought, I found myself underwhelmed by the reality. I had heard little more about Decius than his name, and this brought to my ears by an oarsman of a trade vessel who had chosen to cast his lot…Continue readingTHE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF Part 41

Now they paraded me down the streets for all the populace to gaze upon. I recalled the story I had heard from the Christians among whom I had grown up, of Caesar bringing the captive Gaul, Vercigenteroux, home to Rome in a cage, exhibiting him in just such a spectacle. I wondered, had the Gaul…Continue readingTHE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF Part 40

Here is the map of all the Lizardman sightings from the late 80s, followed by photographs I took at as many of the actual locations as I could find. The Lizardman Burger on the menu at Harry and Harry Too is not made from real Lizardman, but it’s so delicious that I wanted to take…Continue readingLocating Lonely, Lovely Lizardman Locations

If you’re ever passing through Bishopville, South Carolina, a visit to the South Carolina Cotton Museum is mandatory. Naturally I sought the place out because of Lizardman, who is the unofficial star of the place and the mascot of the entire town, but the place is chockfull of interesting stuff, even for a born and…Continue readingA Trip to Lizardman Country: That Cotton-Pickin’ Lizardman

This is a restaurant, owned by a father and son, hence the name of the place. It was only open for lunch on the day I visited, but I’m sure glad I made it in for a meal. The Lizardman Burger was, I kid you not, one of the best burgers I’ve ever eaten, and…Continue readingA Trip to Lizardman Country: Harry and Harry Too

While traveling recently, I did what I always do, searching Roadside America or Atlas Obscura for things strange or unusual to visit in the area through which I was to be passing. That’s how I learned about Apple Valley Hillbilly Gardens in western Kentucky. This attraction, a folk-art installation and open-air museum (along with Toyland,…Continue readingThe ABC of Hillbilly Gardens

Another road trip, this one to Bishopville, South Carolina and the vicinity of Scape Ore Swamp, in search of the legendary Lizardman! I want to give a shout out and a word of thanks to the proprietor of the Facebook site “Lizardman of Lee County—Robert Howell’s Lizardman Lounge” (do yourself a favor and look him…Continue readingA Trip to Lizardman Country

It’s just like with the original Universal film THE WOLF MAN. The title has with time been altered, by some people, anyway. “Wolf” and “Man” are combined. This makes for the more grammatically correct and aesthetically pleasing THE WOLFMAN. When Universal remade the classic werewolf yarn a few years back they corrected themselves and released…Continue readingRenaming Lizard Man

Like so many things in America with colorful names, there is no concrete answer in regards to its origin. This is because the name dates back to Colonial Times, when records for such things weren’t maintained with all that much care or accuracy. Different stories are in agreement that the name is a contraction of…Continue readingHow did Scape Ore Swamp Get Its Name?

Yes, that Jimmy Stewart. And yes, that Yeti. Okay, so there was this mummified hand in the Pangboche monastery in Tibet. The monks there said that it came from a dead Yeti that had been discovered by one of their order. Tom Slick, an oil tycoon (that’s appropriate) organized an expedition in 1957 to go…Continue readingJimmy Stewart and the Yeti

There’s this 80s Rom-Com called RHINESTONE starring Dolly Parton and Sylvester Stallone. I just so happened to catch it on the telly one weekend afternoon when I had the box on for background noise. It’s abysmal, but also a little endearing. Sly is so bad in it that he’s adorable. The plot involves Dolly, a…Continue readingBrickenstein!

After the tragic loss of Chadwick Boseman, it seems everybody is calling for the Black Panther’s little sister Shuri to assume the role for future films. Here is an eloquent, well-reasoned argument—from Jason Johnson, professor of Politics and Journalism at Morgan State University, who is a black man—on why she shouldn’t. “The Black Panther is…Continue readingWho Should be the Next Black Panther?

Concerning the effects the metal would have on me, I should have suspected, at that. Or more to the point, I already knew that silver, pure silver, held some quality disagreeable to me. I had at times laid hands on silver coins, booty taken from some fat merchantman during my career as captain of the…Continue readingTHE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF Part 39

There’s more than one connection, actually. For one thing, both are American classics and legends of the genre. Both are also based on true stories. But if we get a little more specific with it, certain events dramatized in one of the films, the one starring the Fouke Monster, actually happened in both real-life incidents.…Continue readingThe GREMLINS/THE LEGEND OF BOGGY CREEK Connection

There are those who are claiming that, spurred on by the pandemic, livestreaming will finally kill the movie-going experience. People will not go to theaters, they say, when it’s so easy to stay at home and watch movies in your own living rooms. Horse and shit. Don’t believe a word of that. Those who do…Continue readingLivestreaming and the “Death” of the Theater

For a few years, I’ve sported a big handlebar moustache, which I waxed heavily and curled into a genuine Old Western B-movie villain mustache. It got me lots of compliments, and I’d get told that I looked like the videogame character Wario, or Snidely Whiplash, or Ming the Merciless. Or Anton LaVey, although I don’t…Continue readingThe Hodag Mask

According to local lore, there have been 68 deaths to take place on Jack Cole Road, which has been called the most haunted roadway in the State, located outside the small town of Hayden in Blount County, Alabama. Most of these came as the result of a cholera outbreak around the turn of the last…Continue readingThe Dogman of Alabama

The death of Chadwick Boseman has left a lot of us grieving. I’m not ashamed to admit that I shed some tears. Only 43 years old. Sometimes fame, success, and wealth count for nothing. We’re all just mortal in the end. I have such great admiration for people who can “suffer in silence.” I can’t…Continue readingHail to the King

After all this time—how many delays has it weathered? Four, I think. And then with it being far from certain that we’d even get to see it at all, much less in the theater—was it worth the wait? You’re damn right it was. I loved it. I’m not surprised to hear that Normie hated it.…Continue readingMovie Review: THE NEW MUTANTS

Yes, it’s in there. Yes, it’s prominent. But it’s portrayed tastefully, sans titillation, offering neither glorification (i.e. virtue signaling) or condemnation. In other words, it is handled exactly the way it ought to be handled. It’s just one component of the overall story, not more important than any other. It feels genuine. Real. It isn’t…Continue readingAbout THE NEW MUTANTS and that Gay Romance

I’ve said it before, several times. The drive-in has been a savior for my summer. Deprived of a regular summer movie season by the ‘Rona, I’ve been able to both catch some nifty new flicks at the drive-in, movies that I might not have seen otherwise (THE WRETCHED, THE OTHER LAMB, THE VAST OF NIGHT,…Continue readingSPUTNIK Dreams

Or, at the very least, a movie or something. One thing we can say for sure is that the series won’t end with the fourth season, and this despite the twin facts that filming for it had to be put on hold due to the ‘Rona and has yet to fully resume, and that the…Continue readingSTRANGER THINGS Will Have a Season Five

This is one of those “catch up” posts I do from time to time. There are lots of little nuggets of information out there of the werewolf variety, none of them long enough or involved enough to warrant full articles in and of themselves, but if you put them all together you get a werewolf…Continue readingUpcoming Werewolf Projects

Reporting on the release of the sadly short-lived 80s television series WEREWOLF on DVD (due out just in time for Halloween!) got me to thinking about the spin of the heroic werewolf. Not the sympathetic werewolf. They’re always sympathetic. I’m talking a story wherein the werewolf is a genuine good guy, a face (in wrestling…Continue readingGood Werewolves

What can I say of Rome the eternal? Beautiful? Yes, I found her beautiful. Grand. So large and so inspiring of awe as to swallow a man, to shrink him to a feeling of insignificance, an insect crawling about over the ruins of a civilization of vanished gods. But for all its magnificence, I saw…Continue readingTHE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF Part 38

Even suffering as I did through the condition of a loss of faith, I found something new for which to give thanks to God, had I been of the mind: a death with meaning. Nobility. Do not all men, in secret or otherwise, wish for such; as death is inevitable, does a man not long…Continue readingTHE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF Part 37

It’s not an exaggeration for me to say that this show was a big defining point in my life. I didn’t realize at the time just how much so. It was so far ahead of its time, yet so much a part of the decade when it appeared, too. It was 80s all the way…Continue readingWEREWOLF Releasing on DVD

There’s a moral to this story. A lesson to be learned. That lesson can be summed up in two little words: Be nice. In general, yes, that’s always a good idea, but particularly in traffic. Because you never know. That person you’re blaring your horn at or flipping off might just be a homicidal maniac…Continue readingMovie Review: UNHINGED

After six months, I made my return this past weekend to the theater. And it was glorious. (The film I saw was Russell Crowe’s UNHINGED, a worthy flick for such an occasion. Read my review on this site this week.) I haven’t been kept away from movies. The drive-in has been my lifeline these past…Continue readingThe Return

If you’re wondering why I’m writing so much about THE NEW MUTANTS, well, first off, it’s a new movie releasing to theaters. That in and of itself makes it newsworthy. It’s a big flippin’ deal, since movie theaters have been locked up since early spring. Also, it’s a new movie releasing to theaters, the first…Continue readingTHE NEW MUTANTS Gets a New Poster and Images

This dude writing for Bloody Disgusting has finally tipped his hand. This same guy has been telling us for weeks, assuring us, in fact, that movie theaters won’t reopen in 2020. That there won’t be any new movies released in 2020. He claims to take no pleasure in being the bearer of such news. He…Continue readingTHE NEW MUTANTS Is Coming To Theaters. Some People Aren’t Happy About It.

It looks like they’re really going to do it this time. They’re really going to release this movie. That in itself is big news. It’s also big news—like, really big news—that a new movie is going to be released to theaters, period. Movie houses have been closed, under sheets, gathering dust since early spring, when…Continue readingTHE NEW MUTANTS is coming!

I have a friend who has vanished down the rabbit hole of conspiracies in the wake of the Epstein thing. (Granted she was kinda out there to begin with.) I’ll explain, as I tried to do with her, why this is not a good thing to do. But first, some debunking. No, there is not…Continue readingWhy Conspiracy Stupidity is Dangerous