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“Satanic” Painting Taken Down

We must not offend the stupid, no, no. We must pander to the lowest common denominator. Is it fair to call the people who complained about an outdoor painting in Lakeland, Florida stupid? If willful, deliberate ignorance is tantamount to stupidity, then yes, it is. Artist Aaron Corbitt created the work, THE FALL OF DIONYSUS,…Continue reading“Satanic” Painting Taken Down

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When the Jersey Devil Went Viral

It was also a kangaroo with fake bat wings. P.T. Barnum would have been proud. When a rash of Jersey Devil sightings occurred in 1909, an enterprising showman named Norman Jeffries announced that he’d captured the infamous beast and put it on display at his dime museum on the corner of Ninth and Arch Streets…Continue readingWhen the Jersey Devil Went Viral

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The Wolfman in US

I wasn’t sure at first whether the mask worn by the little boy in Jordan Peele’s US was meant to represent the Wolfman or Chewbacca. A little careful scrutiny confirmed for me that it was indeed a representation of the classic Universal Monster. We know that Jordan Peele is a Horror fan. As he has…Continue readingThe Wolfman in US

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North Carolina Woman Killed By Mystery Canine

Initial reports in this case made it sound more exotic than it probably is. A 77-year-old woman named Brenda Hamilton was killed in her backyard in Pantego, North Carolina, in Beaufort County by an animal or animals. At first they only issued a statement saying that the DNA taken from the scene didn’t match that…Continue readingNorth Carolina Woman Killed By Mystery Canine

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THERIOPHOBIA: FEAR THE BEAST Part 42

Marley Kidde felt like a new woman. She’d hunted through the trailer until she’d found Leland’s keys; easy enough, since he’d left them on his bedroom dresser. After getting the chain off, she’d treated herself to a hot shower. She’d even found an extra toothbrush still zipped up in a small travel case. She’d put…Continue readingTHERIOPHOBIA: FEAR THE BEAST Part 42

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HIGH MOON, More ZOOMBIES, and JOHN WICK As A Dog

How is it that this one hasn’t been done already? HIGH MOON. It’s so obvious. A werewolf Western. With werewolf bikers. This looks gloriously hokey in all the right ways. Could this potentially be another WOLFCOP? Not to be confused with ANOTHER WOLFCOP, which was the actual title of the sequel to WOLFCOP. Watch the…Continue readingHIGH MOON, More ZOOMBIES, and JOHN WICK As A Dog

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Science and the Werewolf

If you know any policemen (or women) or hospital workers, chances are they’ll tell you that things get crazy on nights of the full moon. Yet statistics don’t bear this out. Is it strictly a psychological thing? A sort of anti-placebo? There is no scientific reason why the full moon would affect human beings or…Continue readingScience and the Werewolf

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Cultural Appropriation and the Witchcraft Market

To quote Charlie Brown, good grief! There are some really good reasons not to visit the infamous Sonora Witchcraft Market of Mexico City. For one thing, it’s in Mexico City. That was a joke, designed to have the overly PC wankers already x-ing out before we proceed. In reality I’m sure there are many parts…Continue readingCultural Appropriation and the Witchcraft Market

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ABC Attack—Not

This. This right here is why we can’t have nice things. When a credible sighting of an ABC (an Alien Big Cat, or a big cat in some place where a big cat ought not to be) occurs, the mainstream is always skeptical. Scientists dismiss it out of hand. And it’s because of assclowns like…Continue readingABC Attack—Not

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New STRANGER THINGS Trailer

A picture is worth a thousand words, and the same is true of trailers. Watch the latest for the forthcoming season of STRANGER THINGS, then, and you will know as much as I do, or as much as anyone does who isn’t directly involved in the production of the series. (Or isn’t clairvoyant.) That doesn’t…Continue readingNew STRANGER THINGS Trailer

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New Practical Bigfoot!

“The Bigfoot in my upcoming horror/action movie No Man’s Ridge is shaping up to be one of the biggest, baddest practical effects monsters ever,” said Eric Red (BODY PARTS, BAD MOON) recently on Twitter. Robert Kurtzman is going to design the creature. The drawing sure looks bad-ass. So what’s the movie about? Here’s the rundown:…Continue readingNew Practical Bigfoot!

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Machete versus Were-Pigs!

“During the Third World War, the American government initiates a secret project named ‘Army Bacon’ in order to create super soldiers by breeding human beings with pigs. 25 years later a breed called ‘Muzzles’ have occupied the top of the food chain, eating and farming humans like animals. Rob Justice is an ex-bounty hunter working…Continue readingMachete versus Were-Pigs!

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More on THE TRENCH

We won’t be getting an AQUAMAN sequel until 2022. (I wonder why they’re waiting so long? Much better to take the proper time and get it right, though, instead of rushing it.) Does that mean we’ll have to wait equally as long for that spinoff film, THE TRENCH, announced recently? Nope! Said producer Peter Safran…Continue readingMore on THE TRENCH

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THERIOPHOBIA: FEAR THE BEAST Part 41

[LISTEN UP, FRIENDS. IF YOU HAVEN’T BEEN READING UP TO THIS POINT, TRUST ME, YOU’RE GOING TO WANT TO START READING RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW. OTHERWISE YOU’LL MISS THE MOST BADASS WEREWOLF TO EVER GRACE A LITERARY PUBLICATION.] The Beast paused, pupils and nostrils dilated, ears erect. Listening, watching, smelling. Its purple-black tongue dangled from…Continue readingTHERIOPHOBIA: FEAR THE BEAST Part 41

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Wait, what? There *Is* Going To Be A New CRITTERS Movie?

I just, and I mean *just*, finished typing out an article about the new CRITTERS TV series for Shudder. No sooner had I hit that last period key on the ol’ laptop than news comes in that, in addition to the series rather than in place of it, there is in fact going to be…Continue readingWait, what? There *Is* Going To Be A New CRITTERS Movie?

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Lindsay Lohan’s Werewolf Arriving in March

Lindsay Lohan has done a werewolf movie. Since it has a werewolf in it I guess I ought to report on it. Hell, it might by some miracle end up being good. I actually kinda liked I KNOW WHO KILLED ME; the plot was fairly interesting, once I was able to divorce myself from Ms.…Continue readingLindsay Lohan’s Werewolf Arriving in March

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What Went Wrong With The Dark Universe?

I can write those words now and it doesn’t sting. Now, that the Dark Universe has been resurrected—whether it is or is not still called the Dark Universe is irrelevant—has been saved by the fine folks at Blumhouse. Blumhouse architect Leigh Whannell will be directing the next installment of movies to feature one of the…Continue readingWhat Went Wrong With The Dark Universe?

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Let’s Talk About The Smiley Face Killings

Did you catch the series on Oxygen devoted to the search for answers in the “Smiley Face Killings”? If your answer to that question was “huh?” then it’s possible you have never heard of the Smiley Face Killings. A quick recap, then: Since the 90s, dozens of young men have gone missing under eerily similar…Continue readingLet’s Talk About The Smiley Face Killings

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Critters Are Back, and They’re Practical!

I’d heard reports that SyFY was going to be making new CRITTERS movies. This got me excited. Then I heard that a new film entitled CRITTERS: A NEW BINGE was filming in January. Turns out the new movie has morphed into an eight episode series that will begin airing on Shudder on March 21st. While…Continue readingCritters Are Back, and They’re Practical!

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Movie Review: UPGRADE

The Invisible Man is in good hands. Leigh Whannell, who directed UPGRADE (as well as INSIDIOUS: CHAPTER THREE and who also wrote the scripts for SAW, INSIDIOUS, and INSIDIOUS: CHAPTER TWO for Blumhouse), has been handed that particular property. His resume, and especially the results he achieved with UPGRADE, bodes well for the bandaged, transparent…Continue readingMovie Review: UPGRADE

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THERIOPHOBIA: FEAR THE BEAST Part 40

NOW: The heat refused to yield to the coming of autumn, the setting sun providing but a minor respite to the crowds gathered in downtown Ironwood. Just like every year, the next-to-last weekend in October marked the culmination of the week-long “Miner Days” commemorating the founding of the town, but this year was the hottest…Continue readingTHERIOPHOBIA: FEAR THE BEAST Part 40

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Betsy the Werewolf

I haven’t seen this one yet, but it looks interesting. “After getting bitten by a mysterious creature, a young woman’s life begins to spiral out of control as she becomes a threat to the people of a small town,” says the premise. Which sounds like the basic plotline of every werewolf movie ever made, excepting…Continue readingBetsy the Werewolf

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My Flatwoods Monster

When it comes to monsters in West Virginia, Mothman gets most of the attention, and rightfully so, as he stuck around longer and put on a much bigger show. But the Mountain State has another monster who’s pretty famous in his own right: the Flatwoods Monster. First sighted on September 12, 1952 in Braxton County,…Continue readingMy Flatwoods Monster

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Get Your Radioactive Maneating Dog Here!

Forgive me for being hyperbolas. To my knowledge none of the wild stray dogs currently living at Chernobyl are maneaters. Supposedly they aren’t even radioactive. I’m not trusting enough to go bringing one of ‘em into my home, but you can, if you are so inclined. The concept of a radioactive maneater is probably fiction.…Continue readingGet Your Radioactive Maneating Dog Here!

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The Thylacine Reborn

Allow me to paraphrase that line from JURASSIC PARK. Have scientists become so fixated on the question of whether or not they *could* do something that they haven’t stopped to ask themselves whether or not they *should*? No. Not in this case. In this case they certainly should. The Thylacine went extinct because of us.…Continue readingThe Thylacine Reborn