werewolf, werewolves and lycans

THERIOPHOBIA: FEAR THE BEAST Part 53

The air filled with the smell of coal dust. Things that lived long ago, animals and plants, transformed over the eons into dead black rock. The Beast paused, catching its breath. Saliva dribbled from its mouth and over Chaney Kidde, mingling with her blood to puddle at its feet. Its sides heaved, its nostrils quivering….

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-Box Office Bloodbath

Horror is doing just fine at the box office these days. BRIGHTBURN, which is great, has made 24 million thus far. That might not sound like a lot, relatively speaking, but considering it only cost five million to make, that’s a big profit. We might get a sequel. And while I have not seen MA,…

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-Guardians of the Dead

Is it simply that primitive peoples saw wild canines prowling around burial sites, and that’s why those animals came to be associated with death, the afterlife, and the underworld? Think of Anubis, the Egyptian god with the head of a jackal. Think of Cerberus with his three heads standing guard at the gates of Hades…

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-Chupa on Display

There’s a snazzy new museum set to open in a few weeks not too far from my area of residence. It looks most impressive, but they’re billing it as a museum of natural history, and it isn’t. It’s a privately owned facility, and the owners are staunch Creationists. While I’ve met them and they are…

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-STRANGER THINGS at Baskin-Robbins

I’ve been trying to track down the official Steve working at Scoops Ahoy Funko figure, on sale exclusively at participating Baskin-Robbins ice cream shops. I was told by the pleasant young man at my nearest one that the figures sold out as soon as they were unloaded from the truck. He took my number and…

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The Iceman Goeth

That’s go-eth. It’s meant to be a pun on THE ICEMAN COMETH, a play written by Eugene O’Neill dealing with alcoholism and self-deception, among other things. Go-eth. Not Goethe, the German writer who penned the play called FAUST. And the Iceman I’m referring to here is the Minnesota Iceman, who may have been a dead…

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THERIOPHOBIA: FEAR THE BEAST Part 52

(ATTENTION! This is the one where the werewolf attacks the haunted attraction! I promised to give you all a heads-up.) Every year, the Lawrence family “Haunted Corn Maze” proved one of the County’s most popular attractions, as people drove all the way from Birmingham to wander through the acres of corn at night, menaced by…

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Don’t Go There!

This linked video talks about “4 Creepy Places You Would NEVER Want To Visit”. Says the poster: “I’m not talking about ghosts and paranormal activity, I’m talking about REAL DANGER, humans with an aggressive and evil agenda.” But then he turns around and talks about places known for ghosts and paranormal activity as opposed to…

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Direwolf Caught on Camera?

Could be a Direwolf. Could be a werewolf. Could be the ghost of the Beast of Gevaudon. Could just be a freakishly large wolf, and a case of forced perspective. But is sure does *look* like something other than your standard wolf. Look at its tail. That’s considerably longer than the tail of your average…

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Swampy’s Skeleton

Swamp Thing is obviously not a werewolf. But he has fought werewolves. I read Alan Moore’s “The Curse” (based on an idea by artists Stephen Bissette and John Totleben), issue number 40 of the DC Comics series SWAMP THING (by that time in the series run, it had been shortened from its original title SAGA…

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Yetis in America?

I’ve been trying to catch up on my recorded TV shows. Last night I got around to watching the Travel Channel series IN SEARCH OF MONSTERS dedicated to the Yeti. Spoiler alert: there was no Yeti DNA recovered on Mount Shasta in California. The water from melting snow on the mountain was tested, and the…

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PROJECT METALBEAST vs. JASON X

If I could only convince one of the major Hollywood studios to do something that would be in their best interests. They need to just give me the money to make a movie. I guarantee this hypothetical movie would turn a profit. I actually have a lot of movies (that I’ll never get to make)…

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THERIOPHOBIA: FEAR THE BEAST Part 51

Marley decided to watch some TV while she waited for Leland to wake up. She went to Leland’s easy chair, crammed into the trailer’s kitchen with the rest of his furniture, and sat down. The remote for the TV had been left on the stove. She could reach it from where she sat, and she…

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Boy the Witch-Dog

To quote Sophia Petrillo from THE GOLDEN GIRLS, picture it: England. The 15th Century, during the English Civil War. Forces loyal to the king were pitted against the fundamentalist forces of Cromwell. Prince Rupert of the Rhine, nephew of the British monarch King Charles I, was so fierce and successful in battle that it was…

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Who’s The King?

Out of all the werewolf movies out there, there are two, only two, that stand in contention for the title of greatest werewolf movie ever made. Universal Studios’ 1941 masterpiece THE WOLFMAN (originally the grammatically incorrect THE WOLF MAN) starring Lon Chaney Jr. and Hammer Studios’ 1961 equally masterful THE CURSE OF THE WEREWOLF starring…

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Underrated Beasts and Where to Find Them

Let us see if we agree with Den of Geek and their compilation of the “Cinema’s 10 most underrated monsters.” In no particular order, then (actually the order in which they listed them, cuz I’m lazy), they are: Q the Winged Serpent; the aliens of PITCH BLACK; the Kathoga monster from THE RELIC; the Graboids…

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Product Review: Super7 Universal Monster Buckets

Remember the Halloween candy buckets crafted in the likenesses of the classic Universal Horror Monsters? Sure you do. I was impressed when I first laid eyes on them (via the computer screen rather than in person) and excited to buy one or all of them. (Yeah, it would have been all of them.) My favorites…

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Jon Snow’s Direwolf

I have never seen the amount of onscreen bitching among my friends on social media, concerning any topic, as I have seen regarding that series finale of GAME OF THRONES. I never watched the show. This last statement does not make me one of those who boasts about having never watched the show. I understand,…

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THERIOPHOBIA: FEAR THE BEAST Part 50

It hurt so bad, Chaney couldn’t even scream. It took so much effort just to breathe. Yet, somehow, she never lost consciousness. The Beast carried her as it ran, carried her in its jaws. Her head bounced along the ground, dragged over concrete and grass. When the Beast leapt through the air it bit down…

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More STRANGER THINGS and AWIL Merch

Seems like I just finished writing an article on Funko, the world’s coolest company. It seems that way because I *did* literally just finish writing such an article. Now there’s some more Funko news to relay, this time having to do with STRANGER THINGS. There is gonna be a shit-ton of new STRANGER THINGS stuff…

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Go to Hell

There is a mansion in Vancouver, British Columbia that has a portal to Hell inside it. But a court has ruled that this isn’t a good enough reason for the purchaser of the property to get her money back. The hell you say! Quoting a local real estate executive: “Portals to hell are a niche…

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STRANGER THINGS Is Over!

I’m using “over” here the way it’s used in the world of professional wrestling, which developed out of Carnie-speak. To be “over” means that a performer or concept has gotten “over” with the crowds. It denotes a level of visibility and success. If a performer has developed a following or draws a strong reaction from…

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It’s 1985 Again!

Remember me talking about how crazy *over* STRANGER THINGS is? If you weren’t convinced, here’s undeniable proof. Because of STRANGER THINGS, Coca-Cola is bringing back New Coke. And New Coke is selling. It’s selling so well, in fact, with fans tripping over themselves by the millions to purchase New Coke, that it crashed the Coca-Cola…

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The Otter Man

I chose to break up the name of this particular monster into two words. If I’d called it “Otterman” you might have misread and thought I was talking about the piece of furniture, or the Turkish/Muslim Empire from which the footstool was named. (The muckety-mucks of the Ottoman Empire tended to use such footstools, hence…

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Cereal Monsters

Funko, you’re killin’ me. You just keep forcing me to give you my money. (All you other companies out there, tripping over yourselves trying to figure out ways to get some of my hard-earned—well, relatively-speaking—cash, you could learn a lot from Funko. It really is simple. Just make stuff that I want, and then offer…

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