werewolf, werewolves and lycans

Would you survive?

What the hell, I’ve done it for vampires and for zombies, might as well do it for werewolves. This is a silly quiz; answer some silly questions and it will tell you whether or nor you would survive a werewolf invasion. It’s flawed, though. Here’s one classic example: the second question, paraphrased, asks what you would do if you heard reports of werewolves attacking and eating people. Would you (a) calmly prepare by accumulating food, water, etc., (b) panic, (c) steal stuff to prepare, or (d) remain skeptical of the whole thing. None of these things is what I would do. I would get all excited and hurry to investigate! (“Werewolves! Where’s my camera?!”) But that wasn’t offered as an option, so I picked remain skeptical. Because, as much as I’d like to believe such stories if I heard them, I’m afraid I WOULD be skeptical of their veracity.

When it came time to pick a free weapon, I chose the machine gun loaded with silver bullets. Even if I were skeptical, I figure owning a machine gun loaded with silver bullets would be pretty cool, regardless. I mean, machine gun. Silver bullets. Duh! But the question that asks what you would do if your friend got scratched by a werewolf implies that the person would then be turning into a werewolf him/herself. Nope! We ALL know that only a werewolf BITE can spread the infection to a victim. Acknowledging that the quiz is not totally applicable to me, then, it says that I would have a 50/50 shot at surviving. I guess I’ll take it. And nice try overall, quiz maker, but you might wanna fix that thing about scratches and bites.

WAYNE MILLER is the owner and creative director of EVIL CHEEZ PRODUCTIONS (www.evilcheezproductions.blogspot.com, www.facebook.com/evilcheezproductions), specializing in theatrical performances and haunted attractions. He has written, produced and directed (and occasionally acted in) over a dozen plays, most of them in the Horror and Crime genres. MORTUI VELOCES SUNT!

The Evil Cheezman • December 20, 2016


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