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Werewolves are Universal… But Why Canada?

February 24th, 2011 § 1

Whether you’re one of the apparent millions of people obsessed with the SpaceWolves iPhone app in Greece, of all places, or you’re one of the people who practically dropped dead of shock when some of the werewolf cast of the Twilight saga walked into a fast food place in Vancouver, –and chances are, you’re not, –you have to admit, that werewolves are universally satisfying. Unless you’re Amish or something. By the way, I say ‘of all places’ regarding the whole SpaceWolves in Greece thing, because Greece has some of the world’s oldest werewolf folklore. So it’s strangely fitting that its natives become obsessed with a cartoonish werewolf game, while Canadian paparazzi follow around supporting actors who got about ten consolidated minutes of screen time in the entire film series of the Twilight Saga.

Not that Canadians are in any way funny, or bizarre, up there in their weird, barely populated country, sitting on top of the US like a fat chick on a tiny chair. Anyway! Why are the Twilight werewolves in Canada, instead of showing off their sexy abs in the U.S.? The Vancouver Sun reports:

Twilight werewolves Bronson Pelletier and Alex Meraz arrived at Vancouver International Airport Tuesday morning with wolf-sized appetites.

Pelletier, who plays Jared, and Meraz, who plays Paul, hit up a McDonalds near the airport on Marine Drive after being picked up by a chauffeured vehicle.

Both men chuckled at the paparazzi following them as they got out of their vehicle, surprised they had company on their breakfast run. The hungry wolves stopped to chat with the shutterbugs, before walking inside the burger joint with them.

While ordering some breakfast sandwiches, Pelletier and Meraz goofed around with each other and the photographers, talking about their time on the Twilight Convention Tour.

Pelletier mentioned New Jersey had the craziest Twilight fans.

One paparazzo joked that it was probably because the fans thought the two resembled Jersey Shore’s The Situation.

“I’ve got the situation right here,” Meraz quipped, pulling up his shirt to expose his abs.

All right, so, maybe I’m jealous. but it’s not fair! Those beautiful abs should have been exposed in -this- country! Where they can be properly appreciated by about a hundred cameras, who would definitely have gotten a shot of gorgeous ab muscles; or about ten million shots of those abs… from several new and exciting angles. Oh well, no sense in getting all spastic. After all, there are still two movies, that will be full of hot werewolf action, –and hopefully, less of Edward Cullen’s ridiculously pasty, but glittery chest. Yuck. He looked like he’d been painted with a shade of nail polish confiscated from a 12 year old. But Jacob and pals? May the wolves run wild… and shirtless.

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One Response to Werewolves are Universal… But Why Canada?

  1. Ulric Helsing says:

    They’re most likely in Canada to get away from all the excitement of their fans. Haha!!

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